Are you in doubt regarding what to talk about with a woman you’ve just started dating? We suggest steering clear of the following top ten ‘What not say to a woman on a date’ unless of course you are trying to get rid of her, then go forth and use them abundantly.
1. ‘What kind of car do you have? Motor size? Litres?’
Unless she has specifically mentioned an interest in mechanics, don’t bring up cars, boats, motorcycles—ANY type of automotive whatsoever. Trust us: your mates will find the subject much more engaging.
2. ‘Do you fancy me?’
This question is a sure-fire way to turn the conversation into Awkwardville. Asking her too soon will make her flustered or feel like she’s been put on the spot.
3. ‘Can you pay?’
Sure it’s the 21st century, but chivalry isn’t dead. That being said, she’ll love you more if you’re careful about respecting her wishes and sense of independence. If she offers to pick up the tab, politely decline. However, if she firmly insists on paying, offer to split the bill or, better yet, make some other compromise. A suave ‘I’ll let you get this one, but the next is one me’ not only pacifies her inner feminist but also segues into the possibility of a subsequent date—a win-win situation for both parties.
4. ‘My ex had a great……’
A good rule of thumb is that you are only allowed ONE ex-girlfriend anecdote—preferably one that is amusing and won’t make your date feel like she is being compared. If you talk too much about an ex, it will seem like you’re still hung up on a past relationship and using your date as a rebound.
5. ‘How much do you earn?’
On a first date, you’d be best to avoid the topic of money. You may be genuinely curious and think the question is perfectly innocuous, but she might assume you’re a male gold digger looking to mooch off her income. If you’re worried about any similar ulterior motives on her part, try taking a roundabout approach and ask her about her job—whether she enjoys it etc. That way, you’ll be able to draw a good estimate on your own.
6. ‘How do I rate compared to your past boyfriends / dates?’
A question like this screams ‘insecurity’ on your behalf. Going into a date with a confident mindset will make you all the more attractive to her; women love men who are self-assured and positive. It may be cliché to say this, but the first step in love and romance is to first love yourself.
7. ‘Did you notice the waitress? I think she is hitting on me.’
While your goal might be to make her jealous and/or make yourself look more desirable, you’re actually coming across as insecure—again. She’ll think you’re fishing for compliments (with bad bait).
And if the waitress is hitting on you, then by demonstrating a politely disinterested attitude towards her advances, you’ll make your date feel all that more attractive and special, which means a greater reward for you in the long run.
8. ‘What are you doing for breakfast?’
All right, Casanova, you may think this is a suave, nonchalant manoeuvre, but it is guaranteed to set off alarm bells where she’s concerned. Take it easy on your first few dates, and when she’s ready, let her arrange the slumber party for two.
9. ‘Have you thought about exercising?’
Even if you think she could use a visit or two with Mr. Treadmill, it’s probably best not to mention it. Never mess with a woman about her weight! This is a no-win conversation. Scary things can happen, including threats to your life and/or your manhood.
10. ‘At what point can I take advantage of you?’
BIG no! This is probably the epitome of what you should not say on a first date, especially if you’re looking for a long-term, stable relationship.
What is the most tactless thing a date has ever said to you and what are your tips for What NOT to Say to a Woman on a Date, particularly for first dates?