You’re wondering whether or not your hair looks good, if you are striking the right tone, is the ambiance of the meeting place suitable – common thoughts for a first date.  the whole point about asking questions on a first date is to determine whether or not there will be other dates, so use the time wisely. Find out what you can while in the ever important learning stage.

Our Top 4 important questions:

1. What do you enjoy doing?

By discussing his interests you can get a feel as to whether or not you have anything in common. His interests don’t define him completely and he’s hardly likely to discuss all of them on the first date, but they’ll be a handy guideline. You can be open or subtle with this question and it may lead in nicely to others, for example:

2. On holidays, what do you like to do?

This serves as a double purpose – you find out how he likes to spend his holiday AND find out more about him. For example, if he enjoys outdoor holidays you could find out what sort of out door activities he favors.

3. What do you want to get out of a relationship?

If you are not comfortable asking this question outright, listen carefully to what he is saying as he may be answering this question in other ways.  He may want friendship, a casual relationship or something more.  Men are generally telling us what they want, it’s just up to us to listen.

4. What do you value?

This is likely to be the most important in the fact finding mission. By learning about what he values you also learn about who he values – friends (will you be one?) and family (does he have one?).  He may value his career more. If so at least this has been established early.

First dates are about learning about each other.  Look for what shows up and whats great about that person.  Listening and having fun are the key ingredients to great first dates and great conversations.

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