A first date is a ‘get to know you’ exercise. The key objectives are to:
- Gain some insight into what makes them who they are – about their background and life.
- Experience their great qualities and discover whether they gel with what you are looking for
- Find out whether you can see fun in your future together
To help you on the first date journey of discovery, we’ve covered 10 dates that should be avoided if you’re looking to have a decent conversation.
I can almost hear the uproar from the notorious coffee daters who think this is an ideal way to meet. Don’t get me wrong, I am a lover of the bean, but not particularly on a first date. It’s great to keep your first date relatively short; however, coffee is a little too short. A little more effort should be applied than the choosing of a coffee shop! Plus, there’s always the coffee breath… AVOID.
Dinner provides an opportunity to get some insight into your potential partner’s way around a knife and fork. However, dinner on a first date is a dish that should be held off until the second date. It is harder to build attraction across a dinner table. This may also result in the first date extending out for several hours which is not really the perfect scenario if you find out after an hour that they are kind of rude or plainly just not your type.
3. Too adventurous
It is great to live outside of your comfort zone; however, you may not know where your date’s comfort zone begins and ends. Especially if it’s a blind date. Over-the-top adventures should be avoided until you know a little more about your date’s likes and dislikes – but it’s definitely something to be added later in the dating cycle.
4. Long Drive
One party concentrating on the road while trying to generate conversation and answer questions is not an ideal way to get to know someone. There is limited opportunity to build rapport and it’s uncomfortable sitting side by side in a car. This could also be a little frightening, doors locking suddenly, just you and your date driving aimlessly into the night… it’s the makings of a horror movie – SKIP IT.
5. With others – friends and family
Meeting up with others on a first date adds a whole realm of additional pressure that simply isn’t needed. One-to-one allows you to get to know each other without the involvement and spying eyes of your friends who will be quick to give you their analysis of the situation – which could in fact, be well off point.
6. Movies or theatre
A movie/theatre date shouldn’t even be considered until at least the 4th date! You can’t talk in a movie and there could be judgments formed based purely on the movie selection. When you do get to this date, head straight to the ‘make out’ row!
7. At Home – your place or theirs
INTENSE. For one, your date could be a little scary and they now know where you live – or you’re alone with them in their own domain. And even when you’re date isn’t odd or creepy, it’s not an ideal setting with one party feeling comfortable in their own surrounds and the other having to fight a little harder to feel comfortable.
8. Bar Hopping
Drunk and disorderly on a first date is unbecoming and bar hopping could potentially lead to all that. Avoid this one for a first date; however, definitely a contender from the 3rd date onwards.
9. Over crowded places
Busy, noisy places where you have to battle to get a seat or hear each other are annoying and frustrating. After saying pardon when you can’t hear someone and asking them to repeat themselves three times, you will find most people will just nod! ‘Oh, so you like ab sailing’. Aaah huh!
10. Sporting Events or Activities
Unless you know your date particularly well, taking them to a sporting event could mean you lose before the game even begins. Some are just not into sports – either watching or participating.
Now that we have destroyed your perfectly laid out first date plans and you are left feeling uncertain, check out this fun list of first date ideas that are a little out of the ordinary!
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