Are you in doubt regarding what to talk about with a woman youve just started dating? We suggest steering clear of the following top ten ‘What not say to a woman on a date’ unless of course you are trying to get rid of her, then go forth and use them abundantly.
1. What kind of car do you have? Motor size? Litres?
Unless she has specifically mentioned an interest in mechanics, dont bring up cars, boats, motorcyclesANY type of automotive whatsoever. Trust us: your mates will find the subject much more engaging.
2. Do you fancy me?
This question is a sure-fire way to turn the conversation into Awkwardville. Asking her too soon will make her flustered or feel like shes been put on the spot.
3. Can you pay?
Sure its the 21st century, but chivalry isnt dead. That being said, shell love you more if youre careful about respecting her wishes and sense of independence. If she offers to pick up the tab, politely decline. However, if she firmly insists on paying, offer to split the bill or, better yet, make some other compromise. A suave Ill let you get this one, but the next is one me not only pacifies her inner feminist but also segues into the possibility of a subsequent datea win-win situation for both parties.
4. My ex had a great
A good rule of thumb is that you are only allowed ONE ex-girlfriend anecdotepreferably one that is amusing and wont make your date feel like she is being compared. If you talk too much about an ex, it will seem like youre still hung up on a past relationship and using your date as a rebound.
5. How much do you earn?
On a first date, youd be best to avoid the topic of money. You may be genuinely curious and think the question is perfectly innocuous, but she might assume youre a male gold digger looking to mooch off her income. If youre worried about any similar ulterior motives on her part, try taking a roundabout approach and ask her about her jobwhether she enjoys it etc. That way, youll be able to draw a good estimate on your own.
6. How do I rate compared to your past boyfriends / dates?
A question like this screams insecurity on your behalf. Going into a date with a confident mindset will make you all the more attractive to her; women love men who are self-assured and positive. It may be cliché to say this, but the first step in love and romance is to first love yourself.
7. Did you notice the waitress? I think she is hitting on me.
While your goal might be to make her jealous and/or make yourself look more desirable, youre actually coming across as insecureagain. Shell think youre fishing for compliments (with bad bait).
And if the waitress is hitting on you, then by demonstrating a politely disinterested attitude towards her advances, youll make your date feel all that more attractive and special, which means a greater reward for you in the long run.
8. What are you doing for breakfast?
All right, Casanova, you may think this is a suave, nonchalant manoeuvre, but it is guaranteed to set off alarm bells where shes concerned. Take it easy on your first few dates, and when shes ready, let her arrange the slumber party for two.
9. Have you thought about exercising?
Even if you think she could use a visit or two with Mr. Treadmill, its probably best not to mention it. Never mess with a woman about her weight! This is a no-win conversation. Scary things can happen, including threats to your life and/or your manhood.
10. At what point can I take advantage of you?
BIG no! This is probably the epitome of what you should not say on a first date, especially if youre looking for a long-term, stable relationship.
What is the most tactless thing a date has ever said to you and what are your tips for What NOT to Say to a Woman on a Date, particularly for first dates?
Karina is a dating and romance consultant and the founder of Datelicious. She gets to share what she knows about love, and the best way to find it, every day. Fifteen years’ experience in the dating industry means that she has a wealth of trade secrets that she is only too willing to share with people who are on the dating rollercoaster or are building a relationship. She has a sixth sense when it comes to romance. Karina is well known for discovering hidden restaurants and bars which she adds to her impressive arsenal of dating & romantic venues. An avid traveller, you can often find her at the airport ready to indulge in her love of travel and taking every opportunity to uncover the best holiday spots for couples and singles, both on and off the map.