Would you say that you are a stiletto kind of girl, or are you more of the ballet-flat type who cringes at the thought of tottering around in uncomfortable heels? Some of us prefer the even more laidback look of a pair of well-worn kicks and aren’t bothered by a couple of scuff marks.

Luckily for women, there are seemingly endless numbers of shoes from which to choose—shoes for all weather, moods and personalities. This abundance of choice was exactly what Ms Pink discovered when she returned to the dating scene after her divorce.

When Ms Pink found herself back in the dating game she struggled with how best to explain her situation to her impressionable daughter in a way that would resonate with her. In the end she settled on a shoe analogy. If she settled for cozy, lounge-about-the-house ugg boots there are certain things she’d end up missing out on, but if she stuck to stilettos day in and day out she’d have bunions in no time.

It was Ms Pink’s entertaining search for the right shoe—the blisters and swollen feet that went along with the learning and laughter—which prompted her to write about her dating journey in her book, Why Men Are Like Shoes.

When I asked Ms Pink what advice she has for women who are dating and looking for their wearable yet stylish shoe, she kindly provided me with her top three tips.

TOP 3 MS PINK’S TIPS:

MULTIPLES ARE OK

Don’t let anyone make you feel bad that you have tried on multiple shoes. Society tends to dictate what you can and can’t do. Make sure it works for you. It’s ok to shop around. Women not being free to date as many men as it takes is a societal judgement that we should be striving to dispel.

TAKE ALL THE TIME YOU NEED

Take the time to discover what type of shoe suits you and be clear on what fits. We often rush to the bargain bin but if you really want a brand new pair of Italian boots make sure you know exactly what that looks like. Stop and think before you head out to the shops. Be prepared to try on many pairs before you find the right fit. Work out what you can compromise on and what you can’t. Can you tolerate a little bit of constriction across the toes in a pair of show-stopping glass slippers or do you need a trusty pair of flats in which you can walk for miles? Some pairs will give you blisters, some will scuff all too soon, and some will just be ill-fitting in an indefinable way. It takes time to find the right fit—that’s why there’s a returns policy.

ENJOY SHOPPING!

Make the most of your shopping spree whether you are in it for a relationship or for friendship. Enjoy the process, share your experiences with your friends and family.

Ms Pink’s recently released book can be purchased here. You are guaranteed some laughter and a number of a-ha-moments and you might even find some insight into what kind of shoe is going to be best for you.